See Field Day. The whole troop was barracks cleaning this morning.

The most likely fucked up haircut you will get from the barracks barber. Staff Sergeant chewed my ass because my barracks cut looked like shit, but I didn't have enough money to go to a real barber after the strip club.

The condition where desperation takes over and you just need to fuck something. Even if it's the PFC with adult acne. I had barracks goggles on that night I fucked the fat admin clerk.

Person who's been in trouble so much, or been around long enough to think they know how to skate and navigate the UCMJ. Man, First Sergeant's trying to give me an Article 15 for walking on the grass, but the barracks lawyer said I may be able to get out of it if there wasn't a sign posted.

When two people date from the same barracks. Look at those two boots. Just checked in and think they're in barracks love.

When real maintenance crews take forever to show up, some service members try to redneck rig their own fixes which may or may not make the problem way worse than before. The barracks manager wasn't getting my fucked up smoke detector fixed so it was constantly beeping. I hit it with some good ol' barracks maintenance and cut the wires and now I don't have any working lights in my room.

When you have a party at the barracks. Barracks parties can range from a couple of people drinking and watching a movie to an All out rager that the OOD won't even attempt to stop. Dude, we're throwing a barracks party this Saturday. Every floor is gonna participate. Gonna be bitches and booze everywhere.

Nasty women who live in your barracks room. They have completely given up on life and survive off of the Domino's you ordered, your roommate’s beer, and the dicks of everyone in your platoon that dare enter that meat cave. I was going to beat off but then I remembered we have a barracks rat, so I just dumped a load in her instead.

One who talks about their "deployment" from a Barstool. I know Hernandez has some pretty cool stories, but the dude's just a barstool commando. I mean, Kuwait isn't even a real deployment.