hot host, rated red, satire, hearing loss, military

Rated Red Host: Amanda Mertz

JACKSON, MISSISSIPPI- Audiologists working with the Department of Veterans Affairs have determined that the cause of the rapid increase in hearing loss cases among service members and veterans is social media.

Dr. Justin Carson, an audiologist at St. Dominic’s Hospital in Jackson, Mississippi, began searching for the cause of the epidemic in late November of last year. Since then, Carson and his research team have successfully narrowed their search to the social media page Rated Red.

The YouTube channel and Facebook page features content centered around firearms, hunting/fishing advice, food reviews, and Do-It-Yourself novelty projects presented and narrated by the same few correspondents. Dr. Carson has concluded that two of these on-air personalities, Amanda Mertz and Paxton Elrod, are the source of the sensorineural hearing loss epidemic.

Rated Red Host: Paxton Elrod

“The acute and percussing speech patterns that [Amanda Mertz and Paxton Elrod] practice can be compared to that of a drill operating at high RPM’s, much like one that a dentist would use on a cavity, in terms of frequency.” Carson told VET TV.

Senior Airman Charlie Grossman, stationed in Kessler AFB, describes his Rated Red related hearing loss as “haunting” and “literally worse than any of our combat training.” SrA. Grossman plans to file for disability with the VA.

Filmmaker, radio host, and conspiracy theorist Alex Jones followed the issue and stated in an interview that he believes Mertz and Elrod were “put into power by Globalists to deafen the children of American liberty.”

Contrary to Jones’ theory, Dr. Carson believes that Mertz, Elrod, and Rated Red are not Globalist-sponsored audio terrorists. “Look, I’m an audiologist, which is still a real doctor, so believe me when I say- the best thing to do is to simply lower the volume and enjoy [Rated Red] that way.” Carson told VET TV when asked how to effectively combat this new form of hearing loss.

Written By: Sam Miller

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VET Tv brings dark and irreverent military humor to streaming television. Watch the trailer and check out our newest show “Kill, Die, Laugh”  – Chappelle’s show of the military

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