ON SCREEN: USS PELELIU PRESENT DAY
INT. BOILER ROOM - DAY
FEDERICO, 30's Mexican vato sailor pimp, is thumbing through
his black book posted up on a wall in the boiler room. He
hears a knock on the hatch.
Who is it?
CINDY, SOPHIE and RAQUEL, all in their 20's, enter.
No no no, one at a time, you girls
SOPHIE AND RAQUEL
Cindy walks into the room, Federico walks over to her.
So what we got girl?
She hesitantly pulls a small wad of money and hands it to
him. Federico is pissed.
What the hell is this girl?
Im sorry daddy, business has been
I don't givva fuck about slow, you
owe me $200 a week, so if you hand
me $150 we got a problem that's
gotta be fixed with the palm of my
He raises his hand. She starts crying.
I'm sorry daddy, I've been trying,
but the guys just aren't coming as
often as they used to. Im sorry...
Federico looks around and feels bad for making her cry.
Ok, ok, don't get all emotional and
shit on me gurl.
He looks around and puts his arm around her.
You aint gotta cry, shit. Comon
now, have you been doin all the
I think so.
Well have you been doin the walk?
You sure? The one I taught you
Ummm, I thiiii-
Watch this shit girl.
He does a sexy little walk. Then turns and looks at her. She
looks and stops crying for a second.
Kinda, but I've been doing it more
She does a walk.
No no no. You gotta add the swerve
He does his walk again.
Ok, yeah, I see it, like this.
She does the walk again.
Yep, thats it girl you got it.
Ok, I think I got this. Thanks
You know I gotchew girl. Cuz you're
number one you know that right?
Yeah, of course, but hey, before
you head out, do you mind if we
fake a slap real quick, just to
keep my rep good?
Oh yeah, sure. Wanna go right now?
Yeah. Here comes. You ready? BITCH
DON'T EVER COME BACK SHORT!
He claps his hands together real loud.
AH! Im sorry, I'm sorry Federico.
Now get out here before I slap you
so hard you'll have lipstick on the
back of yo neck!
He gives her a hug and kiss on the chick with a warm smile,
she runs out pretending to cry.
Sophie walks in scared.
Ok, lets see it girl.
She reaches into her pocket and pulls out a wad of money.
Im really sorry Federico but it's a
little less than I'm supposed to
He looks mad as he takes the money from her hand. He counts
it. Then gets infuriated.
WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS SHIT ey? Who
the fuck do you think you are
coming in here short girl? What the
fuck do I look like to you? Some
punk ass heyna? HUH?
She breaks down crying.
Shit, I'm sorry gurl.
I'm sorry I've been trying my best
but the guys don't seem as
interested anymore. They used to
come every week, but they're just
not coming by my corner. I think
it's cuz I gained weight. I don't
Federico looks around and consoles her.
Aight girl listen up. Maybe these
guys just don't appreciate girls
with some curves you know what I'm
sayin? Are you shakin that butt
I think so.
Well are you shakin it like this?
He does a discreet booty shake.
You gotta find any time or place to
shake that shit, but subtle girl,
subtle. Make em want more.
He does it again. She imitates it and gets into it.
Ok, yeah, I can get this.
Yeah that's it girl you got it.
See, that's why you're my number
one girl. Ok now go make us some
Ok thank you Federico.
She goes to leave.
Wait up, you mind if I fake slap
you a few times to keep my rep
Oh yeah for SURE, you gotta keep
that rep up!
He claps his hands together twice really loud. She screams in
pain, then smiles, hugs him, and leaves.
Now don't come back light or I'mma
put my foot up yo skinny ass. Next.
This girl walks in nervously. Federico is a hardass again.
Lets see it.
Um, Im really, really, sorry, I
don't know how to say this, but um,
I don't have anything.
She starts crying.
I didn't get any business this
WHAT? -Need more ass chewing-
I know i know! Im sorry, I don't
get it, i don't know whats going
on! I've tried everything and
nothings working. The guys just
arent interested anymore. They
barely even look at me. I think
it's because I lost weight. But i
Federico consoles her.
It's okay mami. Come here. Are you
eating right? You gettin your three
meals a day?
Well, some guy called me fat so I
stopped eating, and now I think I'm
Aww pobrecita. Come here. You gotta
eat more girl. Fuck those guys,
they don't know what a real woman
is. I want you to keep eating, and
then you gotta do your butt
exercises ok? Guys these days are
all about the butt. If you don't
got a butt, guys ain't gonna look.
Yeah, I gotta get back into my
Yeah, what about these?
Federico does an impression of a butt exercise.
He does another impression. She joins him.
Oh yeah, those are good. Wow, I
feel it already.
That's right girl. Your main value
as a woman, comes from your butt,
that's just like culture now, you
know what I'm sayin?
Oh, yeah for sure. You're right.
Without a butt I'm nothing. Thank
you so much Federico, you're the
Aight, that's why you're my number
one girl, now get outta here.
Wait, you wanna pretend to slap me
around a little?
Federico looks out the door and sees no one.
Na we straight, just get outta here
and make that butt worth somethin
She smiles and leaves and blows him a kiss. He paces around
What the fuck is goin on here? Why
aren't my girls gettin work?
He hears a knock on the hatch.
Who is it?
It's me Danilo.
Federico rolls his eyes. DANILO, Mid 20's Philipino, comes
Lemme guess. You're short?
Um, yeah, how'd you know? I only
had one client this week. It was
Yeah I remember that faggot.
Danilo looks up hurt.
Sorry, not you, him, because, he's,
well, nevermind. Just get outta
here and fix your shit.
Do you have any pointers for me, so
I can do better? Maybe like an
informal counseling or something?
No, what do i look like? A fuckin
fa- Nevermind. No. Just get out.
Danilo leaves disappointed.
Chinge su madre, Que esta pasando
con este pinche barco. Are these
guys just beating off all day or
There's a knock on the hatch.
Who is it?
It's me, Shane.
Federico rolls his eyes.
Come in boot. Lemme guess rookie,
SHANE, early 20's male, walks in.
Um, actually, no. I made a killing
He pulls out a huge wad of money.
Holy shit fool. What the fuck is
That's your cut papi.
Whaaaat the fuck fool? THAT's why
the bitches ain't gettin any
business. Wait, what the fuck do
Well, I just talk to em, listen to
em, and make them feel good about
You have beautiful eyes by the way,
has anyone ever told you that?
Well, um, actually no, but thank
You also look skinnier, have you
been working out?
Um, well I changed up my diet, Im
tryin this new paleo thing. It's
That's so great.
So, did I ever tell you you're my
number 1 guy?
No, but, I kinda like the sound a
Yeah, me too.
Camera zooms out as they're talking.